Photographer's Funniest Wedding Moments

I found these on a forum for wedding photographers. Someone suggested post a photog's worst wedding experience/nightmare story. These are true stories from wedding photographers. I had such a laugh for some of them, and sitting on the edge of my seat for others. Thankfully, no brides or grooms were hurt in the making of the experiences.
:- )
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The bride was about to walk down the aisle when I realized I only had four frames left before my Compact Flash card was full. {to change cards}I opened the little door on my camera and pushed the eject button hard in my rush... only to have it FLYinto the HOLY WATER behind me. It was only in there for about 1/16th of a second, but then I was shaking the entire time the bride came down the aisle until I was 100% certain the card was dry and I could re-insert it to make sure I hadn't just lost 4Gb of images! They were all there. Phew -anonymous-
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I was shooting a Corporate party here in Tucson with another photographer. The company was Luis Vuitton and it was their top sales people and the big wigs. About 500 people split into groups and I went to one area to shoots groups coming through that were doing team building things.So 2 mins into I squat to take a photo and I rip my jeans from the zipper to the back. Luckily I had on underwear. -anonymous-
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The bride had given us tickets to the Tennessee Aquarium to enjoy on Sunday after her wedding. I wanted to make sure that ALL of the film I shot for all three events would not overheat in my car since it was over 90 that day in the shade...as a lab worker, I've seen what baking your film can do to your images... I put the film in a ziplock bag in a cooler full of ice...When we returned to my car, the bag had leaked and all 30+ rolls of film -both 35mm and medium format - were completely submerged in water. I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown for the entire 3 hour drive back to ATL!!!!! I was crying the whole way home...I knew I had to keep the film submerged and not let it dry out!I had a darkroom at my house and having the experience of working in labs for 16 years, I knew that what I needed to do was to first separate all the film by speed and color/B&W. Then I strung extra wires all around the room and began - in pitch black darkness - to unroll every roll of film and hang it up with pins on the end. The next day I rolled every roll back up gently in light tight boxes according to the types and took it to work with me to load into film magazines to put into the C-41 processor.Luckily I came out with only damage on about four frames of film out of those 30+ rolls!!!!!To this day, no one but my mom and my coworkers at the lab knew about this.
anonymous-
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I was photographing a bride getting ready and it was dragging on a bit so I said "I'm going to go downstairs, drop my bag, takes some shots of Groom, and I'll be back in about 15 minutes. Ok? Just wait for me to put your dress on." Oh sure, great, no problem, take your time says Bride. Well, I come back and start photographing again and somehow the bride doesn't see me even though I'm standing no more than 2-3 feet in front of her. She's in a panic and screams, "Where's the ****ing photographer?!" I flash a big smile,wave, and say, "Here I am." She was absolutely mortified and started apologizing profusely. I told her it was fine and not to worry about it. Later at the reception her brother said "Are you the ****ing photographer?" and then smiled and explained how bad his sister felt. I just laughed it all off. I'm actually thinking of getting a t-shirt printed up that says "Where's the ****ing photographer?" because it's become a fun buzzphrase for anyone who knows me. anonymous-